Beware Of Guys That Act Like Used Car Salesmen

We've all met them. You know the type. The "used car salesman" type. The guy who shows more teeth than a crocodile at feeding time (as my friend Bobby likes to say). The guy who never stops smiling and pats your back every few minutes. The ultimate fugazi (fake).

Most of the time these guys are easy to spot, a 5 year old can smell their manipulation, but sometimes, especially if the guy is good, you might mistake the crocodile smile for charm or personality. Smart as people think they are, their BS detectors are often turned off in the presence of someone charismatic and articulate.

When you see a used car salesman, you know right away that you have to be on your guard. If it isn't the gold watch or the excessive cell phones, it's the excessive laughing and incessant back slapping. You know the guy's going to try to play you, and he's a goner once he starts whispering in your ear, "You know I'm not supposed to tell you this but I have a great deal coming..." Shut the hell up.

Spotting The Crocodile Smile

Spotting the "used car salesman" type is easy. You don't need my help in that area. What you do need some help with is the sly,"intelligent used car salesman" type.

There are plenty of friendly people in the world, people too dumb to know they are rejects of society, so they have nothing to complain about and always smile. Call me a cynic, but no one with any sense of reality can ever be over friendly all the time. That's why when I see an intelligent man with a crocodile smile, I know that, unless he has Farrah Fawcett under his table, he shouldn't be smiling so much.

It's these guys that you need to concern yourself with. So how can you tell if someone is looking to use you or manipulate you instead of being friendly? Let's find out.

1. They Pretend To Be Your Best Friend

In my world and in your world, everyone is looking out for themselves. No one is doing anything for the greater good. If you have some guy with a crocodile smile telling you he is looking out for your interests, that he wants you to do well, etc., you should know how worthless that is.

No one is concerned about you beyond a basic superficial need to politely make sure you are not dying. If you are not dying, great. Nobody cares otherwise. People are only loyal to themselves and no one else.

Nobody gives a damn, they're only calling because they want something

No matter how much people tell you they do things with no self interest, don't believe them, it's simply not true and you are a fool to think they do. The only people who do things for you with no self interest are your mother, your kids, your right hand man, and, if you're lucky, maybe your wife too.

2. They Seek You Out Under False Pretenses

We've all been in situations where we receive unexpected phone calls from guys who have no business calling you unless they want your money or a favor or something. Whether it's to chitchat or to ask some dumb questions under the guise that they respect your opinion and want your advice, these are guys who watch out for themselves and themselves only, plain and simple. Whether they are doing their networking crap or trying to slither into your life to use you at a later date, be aware.

I have this guy who always calls me every three months or so. It's like he is going through his Rolodex (phone number organizer), line by line, calling his circle of "people" so he can show off about how many people he knows or tell me about how fabulous and ingenious he is. I always ask him, "To what do I owe this call?" and he never gives me an honest answer. I keep listening and don't hang up because his whole act gives me chuckles, but as soon as he hangs up, I'm saying, "What a f****** idiot," and he's saying, "Another one added to my list. I'm a master networker.

3. They Act Different with Different People

If someone is friendly and smiles at everyone, there should always be consistency in his behavior. It shouldn't be arbitrary, it shouldn't be selective. But the crocodile smilers are nice to the people they want to be nice to, the people they can use. Other people, who they have no use for, they treat like garbage.

One thing I always do to make sure someone is as friendly as they pretend to be is go for a walk with him in an area I know there will be bums around. If the guy is as nice to someone asking him for spare change as he is to people he's trying to fleece or use, then I might question my instincts. If he acts like I know he is going to act, I cut the guy off from my life immediately because he can't be trusted.

Their ethics are compromised...

How To Make Threats

Good day peoples,

First of all, there is a time and a place to make threats. Nobody can afford to toss them around like rice or confetti at a wedding unless you’re homeless and have nothing to lose. The obvious reason for this is that threats have to be credible in order to work. And in order to gain credibility, you should be in a position to follow through. If you want to know how to make threats, it also helps to have an intimidating disposition and a history of collecting on your threats. In other words, don’t issue empty threats because no one will feel threatened. Not only that, if your strategy backfires and you abort the threat, it will tarnish your reputation with colleagues and clients.

So, then, what kind of situation calls for a threat? Let’s say you’re in a negotiation with some kind of business associate. Maybe your client has been doing business at a pretty friendly price but the situation has changed. Now, all of a sudden, he needs you like a hit man needs a target. Naturally, your goal is to make your associate pay the financial price for his desperation. So when the time is ripe to raise the stakes, the well-timed threat is your trump card. It can knock your adversary off balance, leaving him stumbling and mumbling in no man’s land. Here are some tips on how to make threats.

The Potential Threat
Before you issue a threat, the first question to ask yourself is where your reputation stands with the competition. Let’s say you’re bidding for a new contract that will bring your company some serious dough if you get it. However, how much do you know about the relationship between your position and your competitor’s position? In other words, are you the underdog or the front runner? Not all is lost if you’re the underdog, you just have to know where you stand. Once you realize you’re the underdog, you’re at least in a position to tailor a more creative negotiating strategy since you likely can’t offer the best price.

Next, in any kind of negotiation, dialogue is inevitably clouded by potential threats on both sides. Typically, one party is looking for some type of service, while the other party is some type of service provider. Again, your reputation will have a big impact on negotiations because fear will factor into this daring game of chicken.

To maintain the upper hand, it is a great advantage to have a reputation that causes fear in your opponent. If, on the other hand, you have the reputation of being a pushover or a nice guy, forget about it. You can be a nice guy at home or in the lunch room, but when you deal, people better think you’re a hard ass or a loose cannon.

Use Ultimatums
On the subject of fear, Machiavelli wrote in his notorious book The Prince that “it is much better to be feared than loved.” The reason fear works is that, in business as in politics, people must fear your ability to harm them. If they don’t, you have no foundation for manipulating your opponent’s strategy.

The potential threat, then, is that hypothetical “thing” you can threaten to take off the table. And if your opponent fears losing that “thing,” and you have the will and the power to follow through, the ultimatum is like a trick up your sleeve.

Essentials of A Good Woman

Good day Peoples,

Hope the weekend was legit. Now on to today's insight.

I'll tell you one thing, there are no thighs that look as good as the ones that are about to walk out your front door and never come back. This is doubly true if she's a good woman because you'll learn real quick how tough it is to find another. 

Men cannot live on broads alone, even though they'd like to. As much as you want to chase tail forever, if you find a good woman, consider the fact that they don't come along often. Having a woman that you can trust is invaluable, especially after the world has boxed your ears for a few decades. Rest assured to all men that aren't saint, but who try to keep their priorities straight at home. 

You'll never have a shortage of problems in life, so I say forget about dating women stuck on the "crazy" setting. A friend of mine got stabbed in the leg with a fork by his side dish. Need I say more? Those chicks are nighttime fun, sure, but they are erratic and costly, and they distract you from business. Besides, I'm not sure adulthood is meant to be fun. Your 20s were meant to be fun. After that, the real world expects responsibility, and a good woman can help you find success. I'll tell you what, they say in your 40s, the most fun in life comes after you've worked hard at something and can celebrate a victory, such as after you've pulled off a serious scam.

So what is a good woman? I know what you're thinking, a deaf-mute Pamela Anderson. But jokes aside, here are some things to look for and a few to avoid.

Good Qualities

Loyal
The same rule that applies to good friends and bosses can apply to your wife or girlfriend. Loyalty is a virtue, especially when it comes to pillow talk at bedtime.  Secrets get shared in every relationship. If she's nosy, that's a problem, but over the course of time, unless you're sleeping with a real deadbolt, she'll figure certain things out, and she of all people had better not be a snitch.

Supportive
One thing that's very important is how she represents you when you're apart. If she goes out with the girls and drags you down endlessly, that's disaffection, brother. If she has a low opinion of you, it needs to be confined and then unwound. In the same way, you shouldn't be dragging her name through the mud. If there's a problem, fix it at home or tackle the issue constructively, but you don't need her plaguing your reputation when plenty of dudes are willing to do it already. If she's got to criticize you, it’s better to have it done to your face.

There’s no way you’ll get anywhere in life if you have some broad nagging at you perpetually.

Patient
If she nags you, this is a serious, deadly problem. Like the black mold that grows in bathrooms, it's best to recognize this early. I'm certain that nagging shortens a man's lifespan more than smoking and booze does. And guys, if you want to make a splash in this world, you can't allow to be browbeaten. Have you ever heard a story about a drug dealer saying, "Yes dear, ok, fine, I'll stop trafficking"?

Sensible
As much as we like side dishes to be dumb, wives shouldn't be. You have a doormat on your stoop, but you shouldn't file taxes with one. If you have a dumb woman, then you might end up with dumb kids, especially if you expect her to raise them while you're out working. Now, keep in mind that I say "smart," as in common sense, but you don't want some woman with a Ph.D. in penis envy. I read this article once that said, John Gotti's wife, Victoria, raised his kids and stayed married to him through all of his court cases and she was a high-school dropout. You do the math.

Calm
Your confidence in your career will wax and wane with successes and failures. Taking risks means working toward success, and if you have a woman that supports you, it's like leaving the house wearing a newly pressed shirt.  A woman who believes in your dreams will make reaching your goals that much better because she helped you get there.

Bad Qualities

Party girl
We all love these types of girls, but to settle down with? Forget about it. If problems with drugs or alcohol are even remote questions, answer them by giving her a beer for the road and saying, "Hit the bricks, honey." This will be a real issue if you have kids, and simply put, it's unacceptable. This is not to suggest that a prude or a teetotaler is best, because it's nice to have some fun with your woman. But if she's tipping her glass by noon and it ain't Sunday Communion, she's got a problem, and therefore, so do you. “In vino veritas” means "there is truth in wine," and in my business, that leads to another saying: “Loose lips sink ships.”

It ain’t all in the pum pum,boys.

Stacked
I like stacks of money as much as I like stacked ladies. However, the bust ain't as essential as honesty, not in the long haul. When you're young, it's hard to think beyond a woman’s body, but at some point after the honeymoon, you'll be thinking more about a hearty T-bone steak than Kama Sutra. After a 10-hour workday, a calzone may be more attractive than her body. And be careful about having dessert elsewhere because plenty of wise asses. A friend of mine, a real sage, said: "It don't matter where you get your appetite, as long as you eat at home."

Behind Every Great Man…
In the end, a good woman is someone that you respect and like to have dinner with. If she's not fun to eat with, then you have a lot of silent meals ahead of you.  Silence is no good. Remember: For it to last, she's got to interest you for 50 years, so take one more bite of that calzone before you throw it away.

the audacious truth

Rules of Wisdom

Good day peoples. 

Hope you all will have fun-filled Friday and after reading today's post, I believe you will.

Today I'm going to impart words of wisdom. I can't take credit for many of these but my close associates have played a role in teaching me a lot of them, and they probably had someone teach it to them. Obviously, some of these rules go back 100 or even 1,000 years, but if you think I'm going to do the research to find out who said what, you've got another thing coming, So here goes. 

Even The Boss Must Get His Fingernails Dirty
Don't make the people under you do things you haven't done or aren't willing to do. Once in a while, you must go out into the field with a trusted worker of yours to send a message to your employees. If you're a leader, then lead by example. How can anyone argue with you then?

A Handful of Luck is Better Than a Mountain of Wisdom
OK, this one isn't mine for that matter, but it's still an important rule. As smart as you can be, there are always things in life you have to be prepared for. Even a wise man can slip on ice. Don't underestimate the power of being at the right place at the right time.

For Every One Word You Say, Let Your Enemies Say 10
I'd like to emphasize this point by saying that the more you reveal to your enemy, the more weapons he has to hurt you with. Let your enemy talk because information is power, and information can destroy.

Cash is Cash, Even If It Comes From an Elephant's Stomach
When you have cash in your hands, there are no maybes, no ifs, no credit, no anything. A check can always bounce, a credit card is for suckers, cash is always cash (which is why thriving establishments only accept hard currency, especially when you are not in the corporate domain).

Never Reveal 100% of Anything to Anyone
I have said this before in one of earlier posts, if you have a great idea on how to become a millionaire, or how to convince TRA that you really did only make $18,542 as a dental surgeon, never tell anyone all the details of your plan. Always hold something back, reveal only 75% or 90% of the plan if you have to. It protects you (especially if that last 10% is illegal) and ensures that your great idea stays yours.

Never Make a Decision When You're Angry
Smart, careful men realize they must have a clear head to think. When you're angry, it's your boiling bloodlines that speak for you, not your logic. Control your emotions. This is one of the most important rules there is. When you're angry, you make threats you often can't deliver on, or decisions you come to regret. Trust me, don't say I didn't warn you.

A Man is Nothing Without His Word
One of the few things even a poor man has is his word. Your word should never be broken. Always keep your promises (you should never make promises, but I know how some clowns can't stop yourselves). The minute someone doesn't trust you is the minute you lose them.

Keep Your Mouth Shut, If You Have to Lie, Keep it Short and Simple
If you don't have anything smart to say, don't say anything at all. Even if you have something to say, don't say it, you just end up revealing something to the other person, giving them more ammo to shoot you with. If your mouth stays shut, mistakes go the way of the dinosaurs (extinct, don't exist).
If you lie, there's no use in you coming up with some conspiracy theory. A short and sweet lie is easier to defend, and remember, than some elaborate story about how some transvestite got lipstick on your tie.

The Best Way to Dodge an Enemy's Bullet is By Never Being in A Position Where He Can Hit You
Don't put yourself in a position where you can get in trouble. Avoid being put between a rock and a hard place. Never be in the same room with your enemy and he'll never have a clear shot at you.

When You Can't Win a War By Playing Fair, Bend the Rules. Better Yet, Break Them
Unless you're some fish ass who's as motivated as a slug, you always want to win. Winning doesn't mean you have to play by the rules. It means winning. If you want to get ahead in life, you have to learn the rules of the side game. Those who run this country learned this rule a long time ago.

Never forgive betrayal
Never.